Align, don’t force: How I engage teams, learners, and parents without treating them like a dead horse!

Have you ever felt like leading innovation in your organization is like the “Dead Horse Theory”? 

Take a look at the cartoon below—it says it all!

You’re stuck pulling a team, your learners, their parents, or a process forward that simply won’t move, no matter how much effort you put in.

This cartoon always makes me laugh—and think—because it’s a mirror to so many challenges we face when trying to create meaningful change. 

How often do we fall into these traps?

➡ Trying harder with the same approach
➡ Bringing in new resources or committees to “study” the resistance
➡ Hoping sheer determination will make others see the vision

But here’s the hard truth: no matter how fancy the strategy, if the horse is truly dead, the only way forward is to stop pulling.

‼️Now, let me be clear: your staff and your learners aren’t dead horses. I don’t believe there’s a single staff member or learner who comes to school or work with the intention of doing a bad job. 

But I’ve definitely felt like I was pulling a dead horse in the past—and that was my fault, not theirs.

That’s why I developed a communication approach designed to align with people—not force them.

This strategy has transformed how leaders engage with their teams and communities:

→ Defending progressive ideas becomes inspiring shared journeys
→ Endless debates turn into genuine connections
→ Miscommunication shifts to collaboration with parents, co-workers, and learners

Here’s how one participant described the difference:

"Rob, before applying your strategy, my responsibility for innovation felt like pulling a dead horse. My colleagues weren’t budging, and I was desperately trying to drag them forward. I didn’t know how to bring them to life. Since applying your strategy, I’m no longer pulling—we’re on the road together."

This feedback inspired me to share my method with you. It includes a video explanation and over 100 “Thought Twins” to sharpen communication and truly connect with others.

Here’s what you’ll gain with this approach:

✅ Communication that builds bridges and trust
✅ Co-workers, parents, and learners who feel engaged, not pressured
✅ A unified focus on progress, even during emotional discussions
✅ Gratitude from your team and learners for the trust and professional space you provide

Are you ready to ditch the dead horse and lead with alignment? 

Connect with Rob Houben on LinkedIn, find this post and Drop the word “Gap” in its comments, and we’ll send you this method by direct message for free.